In the previous section, we discussed among the rights of your brother/sister in Islam over you:
There are things which SHOULD be spoken. For just true brotherhood demands refraining from speaking about things disliked by your brother, it also demands speaking up with that which is pleasant and loved by him/her. This is an even more important aspect of brotherhood. Whoever is satisfied with keeping quiet is a companion only to those in the graves. Friends are only sought in order to benefit from them not to be finished with them or to merely be safe from them. The meaning of the silence which is required is "witholding your harm". The Prophet (sas) said:
ÇáúãõÓúáöãõ ãóäú Óóáöãó ÇáúãõÓúáöãõæäó ãöäú áöÓóÇäöåö æóíóÏöåö æóÇáúãõåóÇÌöÑõ ãóäú åóÌóÑó ãóÇ äóåóì Çááøóåõ Úóäúåõ
"The Muslim is the one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe and the Muhaajir (Migrator) is the one who distances himself from what Allah has prohibited." (Bukhari)
Similarly, you must also break the silence with that which increases mutual affection and closeness among Muslims. Ask about his condition and have concern and sympathy regarding that which tries him and happiness with that which pleases him and show that. The Prophet (sas) said:
æóÇáøóÐöí äóÝúÓöí ÈöíóÏöåö áóÇ ÊóÏúÎõáõæäó ÇáúÌóäøóÉó ÍóÊøóì ÊõÄúãöäõæÇ æóáóÇ ÊõÄúãöäõæÇ ÍóÊøóì ÊóÍóÇÈøõæÇ ÃóæóáóÇ ÃóÏõáøõßõãú Úóáóì ÔóíúÁò ÅöÐóÇ ÝóÚóáúÊõãõæåõ ÊóÍóÇÈóÈúÊõãú ÃóÝúÔõæÇ ÇáÓøóáóÇãó Èóíúäóßõãú
"By the One in whose hand my soul is you will never enter Paradise until you believe and you will never believe until you love one another. Should I not direct you to that which, if you do it, you will love one another? Spread the [greeting of] salaam amongst you." (Muslim)
ÅöÐóÇ ÃóÍóÈøó ÃóÍóÏõßõãú ÃóÎóÇåõ ÝóáúíõÚúáöãúåõ ÅöíøóÇå
"When one of you loves his brother [in Islam] he should let him know it."
This includes calling him by the names most pleasing to him. Umar ibn Al-Khattab said, "Three things will purify your relationship to your brother: give him salaam upon meeting him, make space for him in the sitting and call him by the names he loves the most."
It includes praising him with what one knows of his virtues and actions to those upon whom this will have a positive effect regarding him. This includes his character, his family and everything which increases his reputation and positivity among Mulims without lying or exaggerating.
You should also deliver to him any praise or positive remarks heard from others and show him your happiness at hearing these positive words about him. To hide or fail to reveal such is the epitome of hasad (malicious envy).
Always show gratitude for anything he does for you. Look out for and defend his interests in his absence and especially if you find others having bad intentions toward him. These are all among the rights of brotherhood. The Prophet (sas) said:
ÇáúãõÓúáöãõ ÃóÎõæ ÇáúãõÓúáöãö áóÇ íóÙúáöãõåõ æóáóÇ íõÓúáöãõåõ æóãóäú ßóÇäó Ýöí ÍóÇÌóÉö ÃóÎöíåö ßóÇäó Çááøóåõ Ýöí ÍóÇÌóÊöåö æóãóäú ÝóÑøóÌó Úóäú ãõÓúáöãò ßõÑúÈóÉð ÝóÑøóÌó Çááøóåõ Úóäúåõ ßõÑúÈóÉð ãöäú ßõÑõÈóÇÊö íóæúãö ÇáúÞöíóÇãóÉö æóãóäú ÓóÊóÑó ãõÓúáöãðÇ ÓóÊóÑóåõ Çááøóåõ íóæúãó ÇáúÞöíóÇãóÉö
"Every Muslim is a brother to every Muslim. He does not oppress him nor surrender him. Whoever occupies himself with his brother's needs, Allah occupies himself with his needs. Whoever relieves a Muslim of some hardship, Allah will relieve him of one of the hardships of Qiyama. And whoever conceals the fault of a Muslim, Allah will conceal his faults on Qiyama." (Bukhari)
To fail to come to the defense of his honor is tantamount to "surrendering" him. You can help yourself with this in two ways:
One who is not sincere in brotherhood is a hypocrite.
Brotherhood also includes and demands educating and sincerely advising. Your brother's need for knowledge is no less than his need for food and shelter. So, if your "richness" includes knowledge of Islam, then be generous with your brothers with what Allah has given you.
Advice should always be given privately. The difference between scandalizing and advising is the difference between doing it publicly and doing it privately. Likewise with overlooking another's faults or keeping silent about them - it could be either true friendship or hypocritical flattery depending on the intention behind it. So, of you keep silent for the integrity of your deen and because you see in that silence the best opportunity for his becoming better in Islam, then you have acted as a true friend. If, on the other hand, your silence is based on improving your own situation, following your desires, personal gain or personal reputation, then you are a hypocritical sycophant and not a friend at all (though he may believe you to be so).
Brotherhood also includes overlooking another's mistakes. If his mistakes are in his deen, you must be gentle as much as possible in advising him - but without neglecting warning him, admonishing him and doing everything in your power to call him back to the right.
Making du'a for another has greater benefit than making du'a for yourself. The Prophet (sas) said:
ÏóÚúæóÉõ ÇáúãóÑúÁö ÇáúãõÓúáöãö áöÃóÎöíåö ÈöÙóåúÑö ÇáúÛóíúÈö ãõÓúÊóÌóÇÈóÉñ ÚöäúÏó ÑóÃúÓöåö ãóáóßñ ãõæóßøóáñ ßõáøóãóÇ ÏóÚóÇ áöÃóÎöíåö ÈöÎóíúÑò ÞóÇáó Çáúãóáóßõ Çáúãõæóßøóáõ Èöåö Âãöíäó æóáóßó ÈöãöËúá
"The du'a of a Muslim for his brother made secretly is answered. By his head there is an angel assigned to him. Whenever he makes du'a for his brother for something good, the assigned angel says, "Amin, and for you the same." (Muslim)
As for praying for them after their death, Amr ibn Huraith said: "When any slave prays for his brother who has passed away, the angel goes to his grave and says, "O you in the grave alone. This is a gift from a brother who cares about you."
Loyalty means to be continuous in love for your brother until death and after his death toward his children and his friends. The Prophet (sas) once showed special honor and respect toward an unknown elerly lady and said: "She used to visit us during the time of Khadija and maintaining good ties is part of faith."
Part of sincerity is that brothers never lose humility with one another even if one of them rises in wealth, power or reputation.
KNOW that it is NOT part of loyalty to concur with your brother or sister in that which is contrary to Islam. Imam Shafi'i took as his brother in Islam Muhammad ibn Abdul-Hakam. He used to be close him and visit him, etc. When the imam was on his death bed, he was asked, "Who should we sit under after you, O Aba Abdillahi?" Muhammad ibn Abdul-Hakam placed himself near the head of theimam hoping to be given this honor. But, the imam said, "With ya'qoob Al-Buwaiti." Muhammad was brokenhearted. Even though Muhammad had learned the imam's teachings very well, Al-Buwaiti excelled in humility and piety. And so, in this act, Imam Ash-Shafi'i advised this nation to steer clear of flattery and desire for position or power. After that, Muhammad ibn Abdul-Hakam left the circles of Imam Ash-Shafi'i and became "Maliki".
Maintain respect but with no arrogance and maintain humility but without humiliation. Meet your friend and your enemy with a pleasant face with neither humiliation nor fear of them. Sit conservatively and to no interlock your fingers, pick your nose or yawn excessively.
Listen closely to one who is speaking to you and avoid asking for repetition. Don't brag about your children or your family members. Do not overdress like a woman nor underdress like an indigent person.
Put fear of Allah in your family members but without terrorizing them and be gentle with them but without becoming weak in your duties toward them.
Do not sit with the ruler. If you must, beware of backbiting and other sins. Beware of flattery and hypocrisy i his presence.