Another serious affliction of the tongue is an-nameema. The Prophet (sas) said:
ÇáÈÎÇÑí
ÞóÇáó ÍõÐóíúÝóÉõ ÓóãöÚúÊõ ÑóÓõæáó Çááøóåö Õóáøóì Çááøóåõ Úóáóíúåö æóÓóáøóãó íóÞõæáõ áóÇ íóÏúÎõáõ ÇáúÌóäøóÉó äóãøóÇãñHudhaifa said: I heard Allah's Messenger (sas) saying, "No nammaam will enter Paradise."
KNOW, that nameema is most commonly used to mean the transmission of the words of one person to another person such as saying, "So-and-so said this and that about you." But it is not limited to this. Rather, its definition includes all forms of revealing that which should not have been revealed, whether statements or actions. Even if, for example, someone saw another burying some property of his and mentioned this to others, it is also called nameema.
Any Muslim who hears something which is nameema must pay attention to the following immediate and absolute obligations which fall upon him or her:
He must not believe the words of the transmitter. A nammaam (person in the habit of nameema) is a faasiq (of corrupt character) and his word or testimony is rejected.
He must prohibit him from this action of his, advise him and warn him.
He must hate him for the sake of Allah to the extent of this action of his - for he is surely hateful to Allah when engaged in such things.
That he refuse to believe about his absent brother what has been transmitted.
That he not allow what he has heard to lure him into spying and prying into the victim's business because Allah said:
ÇáÍÌÑÇÊ
{íóÇÃóíøõåóÇ ÇáøóÐöíäó ÁóÇãóäõæÇ ÇÌúÊóäöÈõæÇ ßóËöíÑðÇ ãöäó ÇáÙøóäøö Åöäøó ÈóÚúÖó ÇáÙøóäøö ÅöËúãñ æóáóÇ ÊóÌóÓøóÓõæÇ æóáóÇ íóÛúÊóÈú ÈóÚúÖõßõãú ÈóÚúÖðÇ ÃóíõÍöÈøõ ÃóÍóÏõßõãú Ãóäú íóÃúßõáó áóÍúãó ÃóÎöíåö ãóíúÊðÇ ÝóßóÑöåúÊõãõæåõ æóÇÊøóÞõæÇ Çááøóåó Åöäøó Çááøóåó ÊóæøóÇÈñ ÑóÍöíãñ(12)}{O you who believe, stay away from most assumption for some assumption is surely sin. And do not spy on one another nor any of you speak ill of another in his absence. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his brother who has died? Of course you would hate that. And Fear Allah, verily Allah is Accepting and Merciful.}
That he beware of accepting for him self that which he has condemned in his brother - that he not repeat to anyone what he has heard.
It is narrated that Sulaiman ibn Abdul-Malik said to a man, "It has reached me that you were talking about me and said such-and-such." The man said, "I did not do it." Sulaiman said, "But the one who informed me is trustworthy and truthful." The man said, "No nammaam is truthful." To which Sulaiman answered, "You have spoken the thruth. Go in peace."
The tenth affliction of the tongue is the speech of the two-faced one who goes back and forth between two enemies. He carries the statements of each to the other and addresses each of them with words of agreement and support and/or promises him that he will support him. In the presence of each of them, he praises the one he is addressing and criticizes the other one. The Prophet (sas) said about this:
ÇáÈÎÇÑí
ÊóÌöÏõæäó ÇáäøóÇÓó ãóÚóÇÏöäó ÎöíóÇÑõåõãú Ýöí ÇáúÌóÇåöáöíøóÉö ÎöíóÇÑõåõãú Ýöí ÇáúÅöÓúáóÇãö ÅöÐóÇ ÝóÞöåõæÇ æóÊóÌöÏõæäó ÎóíúÑó ÇáäøóÇÓö Ýöí åóÐóÇ ÇáÔøóÃúäö ÃóÔóÏøóåõãú áóåõ ßóÑóÇåöíóÉð æóÊóÌöÏõæäó ÔóÑøó ÇáäøóÇÓö ÐóÇ ÇáúæóÌúåóíúäö ÇáøóÐöí íóÃúÊöí åóÄõáóÇÁö ÈöæóÌúåò æóíóÃúÊöí åóÄõáóÇÁö ÈöæóÌúåò"You will find that people are like minerals - the best of them in the jahiliya are the best of them in Islam when they gain understanding. You will find that the best of the people with regard to this affair (i.e., political power and rulership) are those who dislike it the most. And, you will find the worst of all people the one with two faces who comes to this group with one face and to that group with another face."
KNOW that this refers to one who does so without being forced. If one is forced by necessity to comply with rulers, that is lawful. Abu Ad-Dardaa said:
ÈóÇÈ ÇáúãõÏóÇÑóÇÉ ãóÚó ÇáäøóÇÓ
æóíõÐúßóÑ Úóäú ÃóÈöí ÇáÏøóÑúÏóÇÁ : ÅöäøóÇ áóäõßóÔøöÑ Ýöí æõÌõæå ÃóÞúæóÇã æóÅöäøó ÞõáõæÈäóÇ áóÊóáúÚóäåõãúChapter: Socializing with People
It is mentioned that Abu Ad-Dardaa said: "We smile in the faces of some people although our hearts are cursing them."
However, the instant one is able to NOT do this, it is no longer allowable!
The eleventh affliction of the tongue is praise. It relates to both the praiser and the one being praised. As for the one praising another, he is likely to fall into saying that of which he is not certain or has no way of knowing such as saying, "He is pious and concerned with the hereafter." He may also go to excess in praising this other and reach the level of lying. And, he may praise one who in fact should be condemned.
ãÓáã
Èúäö ÃóÈöí ÈóßúÑóÉó Úóäú ÃóÈöíåö ÞóÇáó ãóÏóÍó ÑóÌõáñ ÑóÌõáðÇ ÚöäúÏó ÇáäøóÈöíøö Õóáøóì Çááøóåõ Úóáóíúåö æóÓóáøóãó ÞóÇáó ÝóÞóÇáó æóíúÍóßó ÞóØóÚúÊó ÚõäõÞó ÕóÇÍöÈößó ÞóØóÚúÊó ÚõäõÞó ÕóÇÍöÈößó ãöÑóÇÑðÇ ÅöÐóÇ ßóÇäó ÃóÍóÏõßõãú ãóÇÏöÍðÇ ÕóÇÍöÈóåõ áóÇ ãóÍóÇáóÉó ÝóáúíóÞõáú ÃóÍúÓöÈõ ÝõáóÇäðÇ æóÇááøóåõ ÍóÓöíÈõåõ æóáóÇ ÃõÒóßøöí Úóáóì Çááøóåö ÃóÍóÏðÇ ÃóÍúÓöÈõåõ Åöäú ßóÇäó íóÚúáóãõ ÐóÇßó ßóÐóÇ æóßóÐóÇFrom Abi Bakra from his father who said: A man praised another man in the presence of the Prophet (sas) who then said to him, "You have broken your companion's neck, you have broken your companions neck (many times). If you of you praise their friend - and cannot avoid doing so - then let him say, "I believe so-and-so to be ... , Allah is the one who knows his full account and I praise no one over Allah." [or] "I believe so-and-so to be ..." if he knows that about him."
He may also go to excess in praising this other and reach the level of lying. And, he may praise one who in fact should be condemned.
ÞÝóÞóÏú ÌóÇÁó Ýöí ÍóÏöíË ÃóäóÓ ÑóÝóÚóåõ " ÅöÐóÇ ãõÏöÍó ÇáúÝóÇÓöÞ ÛóÖöÈó ÇáÑøóÈø "
æóÞóÇáó ÈóÚúÖ ÇáÓøóáóÝ : ÅöÐóÇ ãõÏöÍó ÇáÑøóÌõá Ýöí æóÌúåå ÝóáúíóÞõáú : Çááøóåõãøó ÇöÛúÝöÑú áöí ãóÇ áóÇ íóÚúáóãõæäó , æóáóÇ ÊõÄóÇÎöÐäöí ÈöãóÇ íóÞõæáõæäó , æóÇÌúÚóáúäöí ÎóíúÑðÇ ãöãøóÇ íóÙõäøõæäó , ÃóÎúÑóÌóåõ ÇáúÈóíúåóÞöíøõ Ýöí " ÇáÔøõÚóÈ " .
It has been reported in a hadith from Anas who attributed it to the Prophet (sas), "When a corrupt person is praised, the Lord is angered."
Some of the salaf said, "When a man is praised in his face, he should say, (O Allah, forgive me for that of which they have no knowledge, do not hold me to account for that which they say and make me better than what they think." Al-Baihaqiy narrated it in Ash-Shu'ab. (the above two quotes are from Fath al-Baari, the famous commentary on Sahih Al-Bukhari.)
Al-Hassan said, "Whoever prayed for and oppressor asking for him long life has loved to disobey Allah."
As for the one being praised, it may bring about in him pride and being overly impressed with himself - and these are both fatal. That is the meaning of the words of the Prophet (sas) above: "...you have broken your companion's neck...".
If praising another is free from all of this, then there is nothing wrong or sinful about it. Indeed, the Prophet (sas) praised Abu Bakr and Umar, may Allah be pleased with them both, and others among the Companions (ra).
The one who gets praised must be extra vigilant against the diseases of price, conceit and lack of striving all of which can be the result of being praised by others. No one can save himself from these things except one who knows himself very well and who reminds himself that if the one praising him knew about him what he knows about himself he would not say a word. It is narrated that one of the Companions was praised and he said, "O Allah, these individuals do not know me but You know me."
The twelfth disease of the tongue is mistakes in expression and the implications of one's words in matters of the deen, especially in that which relates to Allah Most High Himself. No one who speaks with other than the Book of Allah or the Hadith of His Messenger (sas) can keep his words straight and safe except a person of knowledge and fasaaha (eloquence and ability in language). Anyone less that this will make some errors in speaking, but Allah forgive that done in ignorance and unintentionally. One example of that is that the Companions used to say: ãÇ ÔÇÁ Çááå æ ÔÆÊ (Whatever Allah wishes and you wish). The Prophet (sas) ordered them to change this and separate "what Allah wishes" from "what you wish" with thumma ("and THEN") instead of just "and" as follows: ãÇ ÔÇÁ Çááå Ëã ÔÆÊ (Whatever Allah wishes and then you wish).
These are some examples of the afflictions of the tongue. It is not possible to mention them all. Whoever contemplates what we have mentioned of this will understand clearly that if the tongue is left "free" he will not survive. This is when we understand the secret of the words of our Prophet (sas):
ÃÍãÏ , ÇáÊÑãÐí
Úóäú ÚóÈúÏö Çááøóåö Èúäö ÚóãúÑòæ ÞóÇáó ÞóÇáó ÑóÓõæáõ Çááøóåö Õóáøóì Çááøóåõ Úóáóíúåö æóÓóáøóãó ãóäú ÕóãóÊó äóÌóÇFrom Abdullah ibn Amr, the Prophet (sas) said, "Whoever kept quiet succeeded."
That is because all of these diseases are destructive and fatal and they lurk at every corner of the speaker. Sometimes, silence may be the only way of ensuring safety from them.